I noticed something interesting when I was in yoga the other morning. The teacher was delightful, and was leading us through a pretty difficult flow. During this one sequence, she could tell that we were struggling (or maybe it was just me – my muscles were shaking so much surely she saw them from across the room).

In response to this perceived (and actual) struggle, she said, “Don’t worry! We’re almost done! We’re so close!”

I was instantly grateful for her words, but just as soon as I was, I had another thought:

What if there are people in the class who like this kind of work? Who – despite the struggle – do not want to be told that the move or sequence is almost over because they are actually enjoying the process? The entire process. Not just the part of it that spells relief or achievement at the end of it, but also the part of it that is hard, causes you to go to the depths of your soul and pull out the last ounce of your strength and courage? Isn’t that actually the part that makes the end feel all the more satisfying?

Ok, fine. No one likes a struggle. Or do they? Maybe that’s not the whole truth. Maybe that’s not entirely fair. Because I don’t know about you, but after most of my struggles have come some kind of relief, and more often, a sense of achievement. Most struggles have opened up a new path, a new way of thinking, a new layer of myself that was peeled away as a result of the tough times that led me there.

In my yoga class, that extra long hold could not only make our savasana all the more dreamy, but it could also spell the difference between a 6 pack and a no pack in 6 months.

Thinking about this (and beating myself up for having been grateful at her gentle reminder that we were indeed almost done with that god forsaken pose), I got to thinking about filters. As humans, we have created a system of filters for ourselves. At the most basic level, our body uses the skin, lungs, kidneys, and liver to filter out toxins and invaders in an effort to keep the body functioning optimally. Heck – we even use our eyelashes to trap dust and other intruders before they get into our eyes and wreak havoc on our vision.

When it comes to the mind though, perhaps the most commonly known theory of filters is whether we see the glass half full or half empty.

But having studied life and goal coaching for years now (and just being a student of life and her trials and tribulations in general), I know that our filters run much deeper than that. Our filters come from whatever we believe about ourselves and the world, whether we are aware of those beliefs or not. Those beliefs came through our primary caregivers (parents and parental figures), our peers (friends, colleagues), the news, and other sources of influence we may or may not be aware of, all at different stages of our lives.

In your collection of beliefs from your life, you have a set of both empowering and limiting beliefs. And if you’re someone who sees the glass half empty most of the time, then you’ve got a set of limiting beliefs that are dominating your thoughts. Rather than see things as peachy and rosy, you see things as dingy and shady.

If you’re wondering what the heck I’m talking about, try this exercise:

Think about your childhood. Did you ever hear your parents talking about anything in particular? Arguing? Fighting about relationships, family, food, weight, money? What did they say about it? Let’s take money, as an example. Did they say things like, “Money doesn’t grow on trees, you know!” or, “Are you crazy, we can’t afford that?” or, “There is plenty of money to go around for everyone.”

Maybe it wasn’t something they said. Maybe it was just how they acted. Maybe you always went out to nice dinners, got nice things, and never wanted for anything. So subconsciously, you were given the message that money is good, and there will always be enough.

Whatever the subject, I encourage you to think about your filters. If you have a tendency to go to the negative sometimes, make a list of certain topics that are a sore spot for you (i.e. money, career, relationships, love, cooking, lifestyle, friendship, travel, etc.). From there, look back on your childhood and notice how these various topics were talked about, or how they were acted upon. See if you can identify if some of your limiting beliefs came from those formative years. If you don’t find anything there, think about exploring other parts of your life until you can pin point where your beliefs came from (school, your first few years out of college, etc.). If your beliefs are working for you, keep them up. If they’re not, reshape them into ones that are more empowering.

Because only you can control how you see the world (and forest fires, incidentally). Pick the right lens, and the world is your oyster. Pick the wrong one, and your life will spell nothing but impending doom until the day that thought becomes your reality. And make no mistake about it, it will.

Maybe the next time you’re holding an extra long plank in yoga class, sweating from your eyebrows and shaking like a leaf in a hurricane, instead of wishing for it to be over, you will relax into the pose and be grateful for the strength that is inevitably forming.

But no one is saying that a few swear words aren’t warranted. Just maybe try to keep them to yourself.

Cheers to you and your half full, rose colored glass! If you can’t toast to good times today, when can you? The time is now. It’s all you have. Embrace it.

Your crazy friend,
Lauren
xxx