As some of you might already know, I am currently in the beginning of a health coaching certification through the Institute for Integrative Nutrition (IIN).

What the heck is a health coach?

It’s someone who bridges the gap between what your doctor and nutritionist tells you to eat and do for good health, and, well: you, innocently and with good intentions, trying to adhere to their advice and oftentimes not knowing where to start. It’s one thing to get a long list of recommendations, but it’s an entirely different thing to implement them all:

What does eating healthy actually mean? Is it a universal program or is it individual to each person? Do I have to be a good cook? Do I have to cook at all? Are you telling me I have to set foot into a….a…..grocery store? And, I’m sorry, you want me to eat quinoa? How do you even spell that? And what, pray tell, is it? What is a jicama and why doesn’t is start with an “H” if that is how it’s supposed to be pronounced?

And let’s talk fitness, lady. What constitutes “exercise?” Does changing the channel manually on the TV count? Because I can’t be running up any mountains at 6 in the morning, you crazy ass woman! Did I mention you’re crazy?

Please, oh please, can I just have one last ice cream sandwich before you force me to eat broccoli?

Ok, I’m being a little extreme, but the truth is: getting healthy can be really intimidating, especially if you think you have to face starvation, restrict your favorite foods or eliminate them entirely, exercise (gasp – I have to sweat? Ick. No.) and do anything else that disrupts your already busy life, thank you very much.

Good news: You don’t have to do any of that.

I will get into the details as time goes by, and I will offer a free consultation for anyone who wants it.

What I can tell you right now is that just because I like to get up at the crack of dawn to trail run, doesn’t mean you have to. If you’re not a morning person, becoming healthy doesn’t mean you have to start loving the sunrise. And if you don’t like broccoli, you don’t have to eat it. There is nothing intimidating about the way in which I will guide you to better health. In fact, it will be pleasantly surprising and easy. And I dare say….wait for it….FUN!

Yes, we’re going to have a lot of fun on this journey to wellness, so let’s start with one of my favorite pieces of this healthy puzzle:

Primary food.

The idea at IIN is that it’s not just the food on your plate that determines your health. It’s also the food that feeds your soul: joy, spirituality, creativity, finances, career, education, home environment, relationship, social life. This is your primary food, and it counts just as much as the pieces of food at the end of your fork.

So in the spirit of primary food, I thought we could tackle an issue that is close to my heart:

Identifying habits and thoughts patterns that hold us back from happiness and success.

I believe that the happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts. Thoughts are things just as much as actions are. And every action creates a reaction. So I encourage you to take some time to reflect on some of your not-so-awesome habits that may be holding you back. Even if you’re already ridiculously successful in every area of your life (and not lying about it), do this exercise. If there were no room for improvement, life would be remarkably boring. And we would need to get you a crown for being the world’s most perfect human. We could get a sash too. But I draw the line there, lest we get carried away.

Here are some of the habits I have identified in myself that hold me back:

Thinking, “What do I know?” and “Why should anyone listen to me?” and “What makes me think I can do x/y/z? I’m not that special/smart” – Obviously these thoughts are self deprecating and downright destructive, and when I have allowed them to take hold of me (they don’t always get a grip) they’ve held me back from everything to speaking up in class when I knew the answer in school, to not believing certain career paths were open to me, and everything in between.

Worrying – If there were a prize for worrying, I don’t necessarily think I would win, but I would be a close second. I let my imagination run wild and I worry about everything: Did I lock the door (even though I know I’ve checked 3 times)? Why didn’t so-and-so call me back yet? Did I do something to offend them or hurt their feelings? How much jet fuel are we spewing out into the atmosphere every day at LAX? Think of all the airports combined (cue doomsday music)! I can’t take it.

You name it, legitimate or not, and I will find a way to worry about it. And though this habit has helped me in a lot of ways (it has made me remarkably empathetic and sensitive to other people’s needs, and has prepared me for best and worst case scenarios on many occasions), it has also caused me to lose sleep on more nights than I care to admit.

Over-thinking – Just as I worry too much, I have an incredible ability to think something to death.

Letting a bad mood get the best of me – We’ve all been there. Something bad happens at work/home and we take it out on the people closest to us, immediately regretting our words and actions.

Not listening – Sometimes I will come to a conclusion about something while someone is talking to me, even though they aren’t done speaking. Not only do I know that to be incredibly rude, I know that because of this closed form of listening, I am likely missing some important facts, and may be missing their point entirely.

Interrupting people – I hate when people do this to me, but I do it sometimes. It usually happens when I’m in a hurry or I’m feeling passionate about something. I will interrupt someone before they are done speaking, either to give my point of view, or to finish their sentence for them. And honestly, sometimes it’s out of pure excitement. Whatever the reason,  it’s not cute, and it’s not good for communication. People want to feel heard, and interrupting – just as much as not listening – makes them feel like you’re not hearing them. I know that, and I have to learn to bite my tongue and listen.

Sometimes I’m too intense – I tend to take things really seriously, and while I think that is good for my integrity, I know that sometimes I just need to let go and lighten up!

Needing approval from others – I actively work on this, but it’s always lurking in the dark corners of my mind, and rears its ugly head from time to time.

Not trusting my own voice – I know it’s important to make every attempt to drown out the voices and opinions of others to make space for my own, but sometimes, I have a hard time with this.

The need to always do things perfectly – I’m not saying I’m perfect. Heck, I don’t even believe that there is such a thing! I think everyone’s definition of perfect is different. And yet I still find myself trying to do things the “right or perfect way” in order to please the involved parties.

Getting defensive – Every time I get defensive in a conversation, I immediately regret it. The truth is that I’m always listening to everything people say to me, but when I get openly defensive, it communicates to them that I’m not hearing them at all. It’s also counterproductive and downright juvenile.

The need to justify without being asked to – This is similar to getting defensive but it’s less in-your-face. Because I have a burning desire to please people (I’m working on this), when people ask me an innocent question about what I’m doing or why I did something, I have this annoying habit of justifying it without being asked to. Something as simple as, “So, what do you do for a living?” will send me into an explanation of not only what I do, but a justification of why I do it. Every time I do it, I get annoyed with myself. Enough already, Lauren. Enough.

Wow – now there’s a pretty picture of myself! Kind of makes me want to go drown my sorrows in a pint of Talenti sea salt caramel gelato. I should put some oreos in there for good measure…

What I recommend after you make your own list is first, to forgive yourself for being human, and to know that you’re probably going to do these things again. On multiple occasions. But every time you do it, try to catch yourself before it happens – and – if it does happen – apologize to the affected parties (yourself included) immediately.

The first step in changing a habit is to catch it and replace it with a new one.

So go through your list and see what good habit you can replace that bad one with, and call on it the next time you feel the urge to be nasty. Because deep down, that’s not who you are. You know it. And I know you would like the best version of yourself to show up in as many situations in your life as possible.

Good luck, you fabulous person, you!

Lauren
xoxo